


Duality

by eorumverba



Series: skirt au [1]
Category: SHINee
Genre: Crop Top Jonghyun, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 19:46:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8546731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eorumverba/pseuds/eorumverba
Summary: Sometimes, Jonghyun doesn’t feel completely male. He’s looked things up and he’s never found anything that he identified with completely, but he’s fine with that. It’s not anything he’s ever told anyone, not even Taemin, not even Kibum.It’s something he keeps to himself, not because he’s scared of how the others will react, but because it’s just so…personal. Something that’s only his.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Originally for @taketaemtoyourleader's crop top Jonghyun challenge on tumblr

When Jonghyun wakes up, he’s surprised at how quiet it is. Usually, he can hear Minho and Kibum arguing, or someone teasing Taemin, or Gwiboon yelling at whoever is teasing Taemin to _stop being mean to my baby or I swear,_ or Jinki tripping over something, or

It’s just usually loud.

But when he shuffles into the kitchen, only Taemin’s there, sitting at the table, back to Jonghyun.

“Hey,” Jonghyun mumbles, and Taemin whips around, eyes wide. Jonghyun can see the slight sheen of that Really Expensive gloss Kibum had bought on their lips and Jonghyun blinks, speaks again, “morning, Tae.”

“Morning.” Taemin lets a demure smile slip across their face before ducking their head down again, and Jonghyun can tell that they’re probably playing some game on their phone.

“Where’s everyone else?”

Taemin makes a vaguely annoyed noise (most likely because Jonghyun broke their concentration, but who knows, with Taemin) and after a pause, says, “Minho and Jinki both went to film their dramas.”

“And Kibum-”

“Gwiboon,” Taemin interrupts, “is dragging me out shopping with her.”

“That should be fun."

Before Taemin can reply, Gwiboon comes sweeping into the kitchen. “Look who’s finally up,” she says, only half jokingly. Then turns to Taemin, eyes the lip gloss and the fluffy white sweater (that Jonghyun only just realizes is his) and nods slowly. “Ready, Tae?”

Taemin nods, grabs a banana milk from the fridge, and Jonghyun is left alone.

So he goes and does what he usually does when he’s left alone. First, as usual, is the dress. There’s something…freeing about wearing it, something so surreal about the light fabric and the swish of the skirt when he turns. Taemin’s headband is next (a gift from a fan, one that they usually wear only to keep the hair from their face) and then comes a light sheen of lip gloss (definitely not Gwiboon’s Really Expensive one, though).

Sometimes, Jonghyun doesn’t feel completely _male_. He’s looked things up and he’s never found anything that he identified with completely, but he’s fine with that. It’s not anything he’s ever told anyone, not even Taemin, not even Kibum.

It’s something he keeps to himself, not because he’s scared of how the others will react, but because it’s just so…personal. Something that’s only his. And if Gwiboon does notice her dresses and skirts are wrinkled, she doesn’t say anything. And Jonghyun is grateful for that.

Next comes the shorts that Gwiboon sometimes wears when it’s too hot, sometimes wears when she wants to show off her thighs, sometimes wears when she’s too lazy to put on anything else. And then one of Taemin’s old shirts that Key had cut in a fit of anger. Key had said that they didn’t know it was Taemin’s shirt, but Jonghyun knew they just wanted it for themself.

It’s Jonghyun’s favorite shirt, mostly because of how well-worn it is (having been worn by Taemin, Key, and now him) and also because he kind of likes the way it ended abruptly at his waist, because he likes being able to look down and see his stomach, because it makes him feel feminine and masculine all at the same time. “Jonghyun?” Before Jonghyun spins around, he knows it’s Taemin. They sound hesitant, wary. Almost nervous.

“Yeah, Tae?” When he finally does look, Taemin gives him a gentle, curious smile, but doesn’t make any move other than that.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Maybe later…probably not.”

Taemin nods, silently asking for permission, and Jonghyun nods back. Taemin steps forward and reaches out to brush the tips of their fingers against the shirt, against where fabric meets skin. “This is my shirt, isn’t it? And my headband!” They sound delighted as they touch the light blue adorning Jonghyun’s head.

“Where’s Gwiboon?”

“Oh - in the car. I forgot my wallet, so…” Taemin shrugs, and Jonghyun snorts. It’s so like Taemin to forget their wallet on a shopping trip.

Jonghyun watches Taemin find their wallet (it’s fallen behind their bed somehow) and then Taemin stands and faces him.

“I’ll - you should hurry, before she comes looking for you.”

“Okay, hyung,” Taemin gives Jonghyun another bright smile, and when they’re about to pass him, Taemin says, “hyung? That shirt looks really nice on you. And the headband - you can keep it.”

Jonghyun catches Taemin’s arm and envelopes them in a quick hug. “Thanks, Tae.”


End file.
